Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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