absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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