Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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