Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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