he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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