I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
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