ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
