HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
