so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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