you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
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