my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
