"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
