i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
