At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
