The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize