fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
