Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I want her autograph on my taint
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
