things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
