I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
