Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
