i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
