Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
