I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
