her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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