Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
