We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
my liver is dry heaving
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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