is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
