i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
