I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
