i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
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