I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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