Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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