last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
