On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
