Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Did I show you my penis last night?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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