If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
