Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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