She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
