youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
