Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Randomize
