I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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