just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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