haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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