think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
