it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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