I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
