if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
