so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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