her vagine was all disorganized.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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