awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
