More tranny stories later!
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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